Sunday, August 26, 2012

Virus's, sick Moms, Eating Your Young

I want to thank my precious angels for bringing home not one but two separate virus's in the first two weeks of school.  Also a big fat thanks for making sure Mom catches them.  (Drat!!!  If only I could resist kissing them!)   As I was snuffling, sneezing, fevering (I know, I just like the way it sounds) I briefly thought this must be why some animals eat their young......

Of course, I have to get out feeling like crap because I have given all the cold,flu meds to the above mentioned angels.   Now,  is it me (surely not) or aren't stores (my only 2 that are open early. You know who you are W and T)
supposed to stock during the night????  Isn't that what 3rd shift is all about??
As I'm slouched over my buggy every worker is determined to annoy me.  Stocking shelves on only aisles that I need.  Yapping about what they did last night with a worker 4 freaking aisles over. (not even an interesting night for them I might add)   And for the stalker on the loudest floor polishing machine I will hunt you down as soon as I feel better.....

Between 30 minutes and 2 stores I must have had 43 workers say "good morning", "can I help you find anything" etc.   In all those little team building meetings I kept running into on main aisles (seriously??? Don't you guys have a back room to do this in?)   can you maybe explain "profiling a sick mom" and leave her the F alone?   She knows where everything is in your store, she needs no help finding the generic DayQuil.  Her shirt that she slept in is on inside out, she's wearing a ball cap and her head is pounding.   Just stay out of her way.  Simple. Best customer service you could do.

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

Awesome First 2 Weeks of School. Not.

Well so much for my relaxing 2 weeks I give myself when school starts!    Last Friday my youngest came home with a fever, cough, snot etc.   Knocked out our family weekend.  (poor fella, wasn't his fault)   Missed first home football game at their school. Some of my GF's were texting me where I was since it was so crowded.  I told them I'm "over here, in green (school colors)"   Kept playing that game til about half time where I finally told told them I wasn't really there.   LOL   One of my gals got pissy cause she swore she saw a glimpse of me.  Very entertaining for a Friday night for me at least! 

Now, it's Tuesday and son #2 is home with Strep.  I was knee deep in trying to finish staining my new Good Will desk when the school nurse called.  Of course.   So, I had to go to the school with wood stain all over me while my feet still looked liked K-Mart feet from the previous day of staining. ( I really should wear shoes more) And of course the new principal is in the office when I come flying in looking like an extra from Honey Boo Boo. 

Finished desk with a few brain cells missing from the fumes.   Follow the directions folks!!   Ventilation is apparently a must.    

The Hubster comes in last night from work and smells the fumes, sees the office (trying to re-arrange office with a million trailing cords makes him think a bomb or something went off) and looks at the zombie boys laying on couch.  Asks me "how on earth did the boys get sick within the first 2 wks of school??"   Ok  Moms, we all know that's exactly why they are sick.  School started!!!  Duh!! 100's of kids wandering around probably not washing their hands since they left home (mine included)  touching everything and everyone.   Sometimes I think my husband is brilliant.  Other times not so much..........

Now, my house is clean and I am watching men scurry to install my new fiber optic tv and internet.   I still am unsure about the fiber optic thing.  Makes me think of those Christmas trees that the branches light up in different colors.... Oh, well  doesn't matter as long as I'm getting rid of the dish.  I swear, if a light breeze came through it went out.   But, I get to play with new internet and tv!!  Whoop whoop!!   Well, after they get through of course, and tell me they have run into a problem of course and I take one of the boyos to the orthodontist........but, after all that I'll get to play with new tv and internet!!

Monday, August 20, 2012

Fiber Optics & Kmart Feet

What a day.   I have been staining an old deskfor 3 days that I got at GoodWill.(hey, don't knock it.  A bargain is a bargain)  and it's funky and solid wood.  Which was nicer than all the desks I have looked at over the last few weeks.  My husband and I have been sharing a cutesy Target desk.  Tiny, but cute.  Not efficient for 2 people thought. 

 I was almost through when someone came to the door.  Joy!  The new fiber optics guy to get started on our change from Dish to well, fiber optics??   All I know is I get to play with a new tv system!! Yay!  (these things make me happy, don't judge.)  Was sooooo tired of our dish cutting out everytime the wind blew.  Anywhoo, back to fiber optics guy.  Did I mention his muscle shirt and tattoos????  After confirming who he was (really, I should ask for ID but I was too excited to get new TV service)  I was in back of house working on staining my cool desk and singing to my IPod at the top of my lungs.   I realized my back porch was open where neighbors and said fiber optic guy could all hear.   Why was I singing some dumb song from High School Musical?????  And then why was the next song "Call Me Maybe" ??????   Gahhhhh,  then when he had a question I noticed him looking down.  Ugh,  I had furniture stain all over my feet and legs.   I had nasty K-mart looking feet.

Well, there went my "hey, I'm a hip and edgy Mom".  to  I'm a freak Mom this fiber optic guy telling all his co-works what a moron lived at my address.  Now,  If any of you Mom are saying you have never been in that situation I say your a liar.   To my BFF's and fav peeps  I'm sure I'll get some smart ass text tomorrow over this!!!!   Super.

Saturday, August 18, 2012

Diet or no diet???

Hmmmm,  it appears this summer while I was toiling away (aka, laying by the pool) I have gained a few........Maybe more than a few but that's all I'm saying.   To diet or not to diet, that is the question.  Do I brush it off with the standard "well, my metabolisms not the same since I'm older" bit?   or do I bite the bullet and try a (gulp) diet? 

My BFF is all about low carb.   She swears by it.   But, do I really want to stay limited to meat, cheese, eggs and porkrinds forever??  Maybe.  Might be better than Lean Cuisine cardboard meals.

This discussion might need some more thought.  Right now, a glass of wine, a couple of oreos and my DVR are calling my name.   To quote Scarlett "I'll think about it tomorrow"

Friday, August 17, 2012


Omg, TGIF, WTH and anything else that can sum up a Friday  for the first week of school.  I am a sun shiny morning person at 630.  Not at 530.   That one hour makes the difference between crazy mom signing last minute forms and yelling crap! while throwing pop tarts and sweet lovely Mom standing on the porch with her 2nd cup of coffee seeing off her children after making sure they had a nutritous breakfast. (well, warm at least) 

  My darling teenagers have apparently forgotten the number 1 rule.  Mom will make sure everything works out fine for your day if YOU DO NOT SPEAK TO ME UNTIL I HAVE HAD MY FIRST CUP OF COFFEE.  I will even get up 5 minutes early to get down to kitchen to have said cup of coffee.  Please, please do not follow me down asking where your favorite shirt is.  (I try to head this particular question off by having all shirts HANGING IN CLOSETS!!  Not sure why they don't look there first.  

So,  now I feel better after that little rant.   I hope everyone has a zippity doo dah Friday

Wednesday, August 15, 2012


Most people don't realize I have a hairdresser issue.    Since my fav stylist left town years ago I have searched unsuccessfully for a replacement.  After disaster after disaster I just usually get a horrible once a year haircut and color.  Did I say horrible??  I meant a freaking disaster.  So, to save me money and the anguish I just let my hair go.  Go you say??  Yes, As in not brushing it all summer after swimming go.....As in borderline dreads go.    I love my delusional world where I just imagine everyone thinks I have long, blonde bohemian locks.  I don't even want to know realistically what it really looks like.....  

 So, today I went off on my usual yearly nightmare to a new stylist.  (Oh, did I mention I had a 50% coupon?? lol maybe that's one of my problems!!)   After being greeted by a semi-goth looking 20 yr. old I smirked to myself and said "here we go again".  After concluding what I was "going for" as far as color I sat back waiting for the "fun" to begin.  Hmmmm,  why wasn't she blathering my ear off about useless shit???  (useless to me, I might add.  Others may enjoy it)    I just want to add my last experience with a hairdresser (I refuse to call her stylist) was on a referral. She was young and  and talked about how "she doesn't know why she stays so thin, she can eat anything" "(hey bitch, we all could when we were your age. Crank out 3 gigantic boys and hit your 40's and let's see how you look then shall we??) all the while slopping gloop on my hair that she swears is what I need.......A real snore fest.  I didn't care what I looked like I just wanted out.   Well, I looked like I had black sideburns.(I'm a blonde) I thought maybe it's just me.  Let's sleep on it and look at it in the morning.  Well, I slept on it and shampooed it oh, about 7 times.  reddish black side burns.  They apparently call those low-lights.  I called the salon and spoke with Snookie (not her real name, I have no idea what is) who very slowly said all I need to do was give it a shampoo in Dawn Dishwasing detergent.   DId you catch that???  Effing Dawn.    Well, my point is after $130 I think Snookie ought to wash my head with Dawn.   The Dawn just made it dark dark orange.  So, that is just one of my hairdresser horror stories hence why I tried again today.

  But, Hallelujah!!!  What a fabulous experience!! While our next chair patron prattled on about her upcoming trip to Uganda to read to kids (Um, I know of kids at my own sons school who need help with reading, and oh don't have enough to eat either)  just saying.  And her victory over Nutella  being claimed not healthy!  wow.  My gal (lets call her Bella)  It's not but I like Twilight.   stayed silent and did her job thoroughly  (you could tell)  Asked me a few pertinent questions about my family and that was it.  Sat with me during processing and didn't act like she had to sit with the overweight (well!!) middle age hag.  Loved her!!   My hair looks fab.  My boys did not ask "what happened" when they saw me.  Love it!!   So, my point is don't judge a book blah blah blah and keep trying??

Fun pics of the Hubs and little darlings :)

Went shopping and to lunch with my BFF yesterday.  The older we get the more we have to dring at lunch to brave the dressing room mirrors!!   Wasn't quite too bad.  I was only looking at dresses/skirts to last thru fall of subbing at school.   So much easier to hide and cameflouge with a dress than pants and a shirt.   Not a fan of back fat showing through!!!   Had fun but got back home tooo  late to cook dinner (what a crappy Mom, and on the 2nd day of school too!)   So,  darling hubs picked up a sack of Chilis to go.   Much better than I would have cooked anyway.  I was born without the cooking and planning meals gene.  Swear.     BFF and I had awesome time as usual.  We are determined to start hitting Estate Sales together.   Sign of getting old I guess!!!   We both luv luv luv old costume jewelry and I love picking up things to sell on Ebay so I can tell the hubs how much money I "made" shopping!!   bahahahahah   He things I'm a loon!!  Today it's about getting a hair cut (ugh)   I'm horrible about getting those!!  And I want a desk for our office.  We have a little one that hubs uses but I like a big one for all of my crap.  No sub line calling so yay!!  Maybe I can get those 2 things done.  Of course, it will interfere with my laundry issue on dining room table (swore I would never ever have laundry laying on a table and here you go. :(

Monday, August 13, 2012

Back pack shopping with my teenage boys.  It's going to be a long school year..............

First day of school!!!    The little angels got on the bus without a hitch.  Of course, this is only day one and by the end of the week I will find myself driving in my pajamas to school because we were late.  Actually, if last year is any indication that will be my mornings for the entire school year. 

Thursday, August 9, 2012

First Post

Ok,  this is my first blog so don't judge!!   I figure I blog all day in my mind that maybe it
would free up some space in my brain if I got it out.  I am a Mom but not a sicky sweet bloggy Mom.  I have no recipes to share nor do I care of your great chicken dish you had last night.  I am a Disney World fanatic and go there every year.   But, I am not a cutesy Micky and Minnie fan.  I have 3 sons ( 2 teenagers and 1 in the Navy) whom while drives me nuts and smell funky I adore.

I am married to Archie Bunker (just kidding, sorta)  We are a normal not fakey family. It works for us.   Think The Hecks from "The Middle".    I tend to rattle off random thoughts with no order whatsoever so if that bugs you you might want to run along.   Today, it was either start my new blog or lay at the pool half listening to all the Moms blather on about $50 sunscreen and coupons.  Since I can't find my ear buds I chose this.   I have had this running list of obscure names that mean nothing to any one  but I enjoy gathering them. 

The MS (Multiple Sclerosis) part of my blog will be boring to most.  It's not fun and sometimes sounds whiney.   But it's my blog so.......