Tuesday, November 19, 2013

Kamikaze Squirrels

Ahhh, that time of year where squirrels bustle around hiding all their nuts. 

 And also darting out in front of my car 25 times a day in a suicide mission.

I have about had a dozen wrecks in a week dodging the little bastards.  

Seriously,  who do I need to call?  Animal control?  That would go well.  "Hey, I need you guys to come and control all the squirrels that are running in front of my car".  "What?  No, I'm not drunk"!

Monday, November 11, 2013

Inherited Tomfoolery or Buffoonery

More Tomfoolery,   And in all honesty looking at these there might be more of a hereditary issue than I realized.  Sorry Fella's!!

I Don't Do Christmas Cards

I quit sending Christmas cards quite a while back.   I mean, c'mon stamps are pricey and I text with these people all year long....Bah Humbug.

But, if I had to send one this would be it:   Because it makes me laugh like crazy.  And we look like the Jetsons.

My Boys Are Bufoons

Just recently had time to sit down and go through all of our vacation pics.  You know, the ones that you delete half of when you realize the chubby one is yourself....lol  

Anyhoo,  upon looking closer I realize my rather quiet 14 year old is quite the prankster.  Every picture that he was on a ride (Disney World)  he pretended to be asleep.  How on earth he knew where all the cameras were I'll never know.  Maybe it's because we've been there 4,316 times......

Laughter is Good

Laughing is my all time favorite thing to do. Whether it's at the expense of myself or others.  Truly. 

This morning over coffee I was busting a gut over one of those text auto-correct error sites.  Oh my,  I haven't laughed so hard in so long!  

Saturday, November 9, 2013

My Target Military Meltdown

After my teen fool incident yesterday (yes, he came home and apologized and found his Star Wars pen in the bushes.. see last post)  I felt some retail therapy was in order.  Maybe some some special Christmas gifts for the teen fool.  Lol.   I can't stay mad at them long.  They are so darn funny and cute!

I needed to mail my Christmas gifts to my sweet oldest baby boy overseas. He's in the Navy and if I don't send it this week he won't get it til February. (Lesson learned the hard way last year)  I wanted to pick up one more thing. Maybe something Christmasy.

Well, there I am in Target when I am struck by the Christmas spirit in the form of a glittery snowball.  That played music!!  That had a little 2013 stamped into the base!  That suddenly reminded me that my Navy baby will not be back home until next July just briefly.   Yes. I will get this for him.  So he will hear a little Christmas tune and think of cold weather and snow. And maybe he will think of his family and especially his Mom who cries every week and misses him so much and OMG I have lost it completely in Target.  In the Christmas Dept.  

I haven't heard his sweet voice in months.   We have been able to email about once every two weeks and that's it. 

To everyone who witnessed the crazy blonde clutching two snow globes while crying and pretending she wasn't.   Who was wiping the snot on her sleeve because she didn't have any tissues on her. I am sorry for my messy display.

To my fellow military Moms out there.  Thank you for understanding.  It sucks.

Friday, November 8, 2013

Teen Fool

Let me start by saying I love my teens.  Surprisingly they don't drive me crazy.  Yet.   I've been on guard waiting, watching for them to turn into teen fools. You know, belligerent, forgetful, obnoxious, smelly etc. ie. Fools.   My oldest did that somewhat so I am prepared.

My 14& 15 are either delayed in that department or heaven forbid not going to become teen fools.......HaHa   That's a good one.  I'm delusional.  Of course they will.  It's just a matter of time.

My 15 year old didn't want to turn in Dr. note this morning from being sick yesterday.  To me it's a $110 piece of paper saying he didn't feel good yesterday so don't turn us in to the truancy dept.....

  Why didn't he want to turn it in?   Good question.  Who the hell knows.  He said he'd do it Monday.  Nope, I said "you'll do it today and then you won't have to worry about it". 

He got pissed and slammed out the door.  Threw his new cereal box toy pen in the bushes. (who knew that teens still love those cheap toys in cereal??) 

Now he's texting me saying he doesn't know why it was a big deal (it wasn't. He made it a big deal.)  And that maybe he shouldn't go on overnight camping trip tonight.  His attempt at reverse psychology?  Silly boy.  I've got years of that ahead of him.   What a twit.  I think I'll call his bluff on that one.  That will make him think a little and maybe just maybe the almighty Mom is a tad on to him.  

Hmmmmm.  I don't have girls so I'm putting this one in the "Drama" category.

Or better yet Let The TEEN FOOL games begin..........

Sunday, November 3, 2013

Time Change

I panicked last week because I thought last weekend was time change week.  So, I tossed and turned last Saturday night worried that I would over sleep, under sleep whatever.  

You would think that I would have learned my lesson from that.   Nope.  Not me.   I woke up at my usual 6:30 Sunday morning.  Drank my coffee, read my paper and got ready.
  An hour early.  Never once thought about the time change until I sat at my computer and wondered why it had a different time than my stove.   Who needs a clock when you have one on the stove right?

Lesson of the week. Teresa J apparently has short term memory and is a moron......